Walking with faith tends to turn out better than just having a "concrete" plan. A flexible plan with faith creates miracles. That's a tweet I read today. Incredibly enough, it probably resonates even more now than ever before.
Earlier this week:
me - "but what are we going to do if we can't get them? I am so frustrated by this. I'm frustrated that they won't help us. I know they already they are there. They exist. I am so frustrated."
Mr. MachC - "we will get them. It will be okay. We just have to send out lots of prayers that they will be there. And this will work out."
And this morning in the shower I prayed. Or maybe I just talked. A lot. About what I would like to see happen & how I already know in my heart that the boys have social security numbers. That I didn't understand what the legal secretary (although I'm not sure if that's her title or not, that is who we were dealing with) kept telling us that we would need them reissued and they needed this and that and the other. (I won't bore you with all those details! But let me say this: it didn't make sense! And I knew that in my heart.) I just kept going back to paperwork I signed in the hospital, conversations with the nurses on staff, chats with their birthmother about the cards themselves. Please just let this work out. Please don't let this be a complicated process right now. I need this one thing to be easy. (Yes, selfish maybe? But it's part of the truth.)
hours into this morning:
Mr. MachC - "guess what ... they have numbers! We have them! We're all set." (I can feel the smile through the phone call.)
me - "Really? I mean ... really?" I feel myself start to tear up a little.
Mr. MachC - "yes, really"
Then I start to step in, to say (again) how frustrating it was to be treated that way by the support staff ... that she didn't know ... how have I done this less than her & I knew that what she was telling me wasn't right ... why can't people do their jobs!
Mr. MachC - "wait ... hold on a second ... (off the phone: yes, okay ... okay ... yes) ... (back on the phone) your truth has been duly noted and filed away. It was recorded by the recorder. ... Hon ... it's going to be okay."
A flexible plan with faith creates miracles.
My four little miracles.
I don't ever want to paint the picture that this is easy. There are parts that seemed fairly 'easy' or rather 'uneventful' on the scale of hard & difficult, but of course there are things that have been frustrating & have taken months to resolve. But you know what? They get resolved & you move on. And it will never matter how frustrating one single issue or piece of paperwork may be (in the adoption process), I wouldn't change this for the world. This was meant to be. Another walk in faith - for those of you who wonder ... for those of you who are considering ... you know who you are ... that is the best way to explain it. It's a walk in faith. You have to take the leap & know that you will be caught. It's just the way it is.
PS - Isn't it nice when things work out better than you expected.
PPS - Always a work in progress, isn't it ... this learning bit ;) ... Happy Friday